Crisis

So, as I walked into the hospital where I work today, I was swamped with an overwhelming wave of sadness. It's been a rough summer on my extended family...

My Grandfather has had a debilitating illness for a number of years now. We've actually been really lucky. Despite his illness, he's been able to triumph over most of his issues. This summer, however, his health has declined rapidly. My Grandmother has been expending massive amounts of energy to care for him, and it's taking it's toll. She's to the point where she can't do it anymore. My mom and her siblings were forced to tell my grandfather that changes were going to have to be made. That he can't safely drive anymore. That because of circumstances, he will need to move into an assisted living facility.

This has been traumatic for everyone, but today as I came to work....
Part of the reason I work here is because my Grandfather wanted me to. In his youth and middle age, he's been on the hospital's board of trustees, been very involved. I have never had to deal with this before...all of the other grandparents I've lost have gone quickly and relatively painlessly. To see my brillant, wonderful grandfather, trapped in a body that will no longer let him do the things he wants, is so very painful.

My Grandfather is everything a man should be. Wonderful husband and father. Provider. Generous. Loving. Always, always honored his priesthood. Taught me what that meant. Served without reservation or complaint. Encouraged me to get my education. Helped me along the way, both intellectually and financially. Witnessed the birth of 2 of my 3 children. Has supported me in every aspect of my life. I love and respect him so much. I feel both blessed and cursed...blessed to have had the time and memories that I have had, and cursed to watch the physical and mental pain that he's now in.