Journey

Happiness is a Journey, not a destination.


Namaste.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

A quick update

So, nothing much happened over the weekend...Soccer, Primary...although we did get a good jump on finishing our moulding. Saturday, we bought all the strips we needed, and saturday night I stained it all. Cole started nailing it up Sunday morning...all the long pieces are done, and a few of the shorter ones. We're getting so close....

Just because she's so cute, I tried to get a video of her...but she's more interested in the camera than in performing!

She's 18 months old tomorrow, and I'm continually amazed at how much she's talking and how quickly she's becoming an older toddler.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Focus....

So, I feel very out of focus tonight. I'm at work, we've been crazy busy, admitting very sick babies...and the baby I've been taking care of has required me to be at his side constantly. So, my focus is intent on him...and I can't focus on anything else. It's a very strange feeling...I don't know if it's because I have a headache, because I haven't been sleeping well, because it's been a rough week at our house....

However, my very specific focus has had good results. The infant I'm caring for is stabilizing....

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Kyle got his Bear!!!!

I'm so proud of my oldest son!!! He's worked hard, and tonight he received his Bear Badge. Kyle is a very good boy, very helpful, and takes good care of me, his dad, and his younger brother and sister. A few things about Kyle....
----He loves his mommy. He still thinks I'm the most beautiful woman in the world.
----The other day, he couldn't find Alec after school. He looked all over, and finally went to the office to ask for help. They paged Alec, and when he didn't answer, they called me. I went outside to look, and Alec was coming in...he had needed to go to the bathroom, and didn't wait for Kyle. Kyle, however, knew that he was responsible to get Alec home, and he did a great job.
---He loves Talia. He enjoys playing with her, hugging and holding her, and lets her climb all over him when he's playing his gameboy or the playstation. I know he will always be her protector, the one who always looks out for her.
---He enjoys helping Cole with all the Halloween stuff, and has decided to forgo trick-or-treating this year in order to be part of Cole's "Halloween Experience".

I was very blessed when the Lord sent this special spirit to be my firstborn. He is everything I could ever want in a son.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Voices from the Past

So, I had a fun and interesting day today. Cole and I, along with Talia, took his Mom and Grandma down to Salt Lake. We went to place flowers on the graves of Cole's Great-grandparents. My MIL has been having some health problems over the last 8 months or so, and thank goodness she's doing much better, but because of those issues, they weren't able to get to the cemetary for Memorial Day. I think everyone felt much better after going...my MIL and her mother, for getting there and paying respects, Cole (and his Dad), for getting them there and back safely, and me, for getting to see the geneologic link to Cole's past.
Oh, and Talia had a good time too.
My MIL and her mother ....it was a perfect day, beautiful outside and the temp was perfect! I find cemeteries fascinating and enlightening. I enjoy going there, seeing the graves of relatives from the past, and hearing stories told that I may not have heard before. Cole really enjoys cemetaries as well, so after we went home and napped, he and I(along with Alec and Talia--Kyle opted to stay home) went out to the main cemetary here in Ogden. He wanted some pics, and as long as we were there, I wanted to see my Great-Grandparents. Cole got some good pics, and posted them on his blog. We also saw Cole's grandparents graves while we were there, and some of that fascinating history came to light...Cole's grandma had twin sons before she had my FIL. They were 2 months early, and one died the day he was born and the other died the next day. But their birthday was the same as Talia's. I find these links quite interesting...did the Lord plan it that way...to link the past to the present? Is is just a coincidence? These little details....
I remembered after I saw the gravestone that my FIL mentioned that Talia shared a birthday with his brothers that didn't survive. I think it gives a happy memory to a sad day....even though my FIL never knew his brothers, he felt his mother's sadness at their deaths...and remembers.

I guess that's what it's all about. Remembering. Remembering those voices from our Pasts.



I took a lot of pictures, but since the info on each gravestone is incredibly specific, I've chosen not to post them. I feel really good about what we did today.

Sorry for the Teaser....

Ok, I'm so sorry to all of you for the Teaser line...and then not following up. I felt fine on Monday when I posted...and then....
Tuesday, I had daycare for Talia all day, so after working, I got the boys off to school and then took her to daycare. I went back to sleep, and didn't sleep really well. I didn't get up til 1:15. I didn't feel good, but I often don't feel good when I don't sleep well. I thought I'd get a shower, and eat, and feel better. However, I didn't. I kept feeling worse and worse, like all my energy had been sapped away, and my stomach was queasy. I started throwing up about 5 minutes to 2. Plus, it was coming out liquid and explosive from the other end as well. Great. It was too late to call in sick. I prayed for strength to get through it so I could get to work, or for confirmation that I needed to do the worst possible thing to my co-workers, and call in sick really, really late (I start working at 3pm). As I couldn't get out of the bathroom for more than a minute at a time, and barely had the energy to get off the bathroom floor to go get the phone, I made a really, really tough decision. So to any of my friends who I was supposed to work with that night, I'm so, so sorry, but I would have been useless anyway. I threw up for about 3 hours, but as long as I laid in bed and didn't move, I was mostly ok. But if I got up at all, I got the shivers, shakes, and all kinds of awful physical feelings. My fever went up to 103, I couldn't keep anything down. Or in, for that matter. It was awful. The nausea went away after about 3 hours. I was able to keep liquids down, but still had a fever and felt like crap. Cole ran the household, and I shivered in bed all night. Finally, when meds stayed down, my fever broke. About 8 hours after it all started, everything was OK except the diarrhea part. And by the next morning, I was fine. So, now I understand what Cole, Kyle and Talia went through last weekend. Alec still hasn't experienced it, so I hope he doesn't.

So, my big news....does anyone who's known me for at least 13 years remember this dress?
I'm sure y'all probably don't, but it's kind of like my "Holy Grail" so to speak...This is the dress my mom and I bought right before my wedding. We bought it for the night I went through the Temple for the first time. It hasn't fit me for years, since after I had Kyle. I had an old pic of me in it, much younger with long, curly hair that was my natural golden brown color...but I couldn't find it so that I could post the comparison. However...many friends say, Oh, I still fit into my wedding dress...or, I can't quite get back into my wedding dress...well, as my wedding dress is preserved and sealed in a box, so that Talia can wear it someday if she wants, this is the closest thing I have to saying...I can fit back into my wedding dress. I hit my pre-pregnancy weight this week...a little bit lower actually. I'm done losing, I'm to maintenance. It feels wonderful, and to celebrate I went shopping yesterday. So, that's my big news. Maybe it's just news to everyone else, but for me, a girl who's struggled with her weight since she was 12....this is so incredible to me.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Soccer...

My handsome Oldest child....I sooooooooooooooo enjoyed his game on Saturday. He played well, played hard, and I was really proud of him. There are 2 other boys from the ward on his team too, which was fun, because I could cheer for all of them.
This pic was taken right before he made a great stop....
Whee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The minute we got to the school, Talia was saying Whee....she had discovered the slide at soccer practices this week, and we had a hard time prying her away...
Alec played my nephew Parker's team this week...Most of Alec's team really isn't...driven...I guess is the best way to describe it. We got beaten, again, but the kids seemed not to care.
My Niece Gracie is darling!
I also have some other big news...but it will have to wait until tomorrow!!!!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Viral Invaders!

So, whatever Cole was sick with was NOT something he ate...because today, after we got home from all the soccer games Talia started throwing up. And then, a couple of hours later, Kyle started throwing up. It seems to be pretty short lived...Talia is feeling better right now, and has kept food and water down for a few hours now. Kyle is starting to feel a bit better too...So far Alec and I aren't showing any signs, so I'll be praying that this little intestinal bug misses us.

I did get some fun, good pics at soccer today...I'll post them later.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Changes....

So, Cole came home from work sick yesterday...he ate something that really didn't agree with him, and he was in horrible pain. He was still not feeling great this morning, so he took a sick day to take it easy. It worked out great for me, because he felt good enough to let me sleep after working. So, when I woke up, I found him getting ready to use the table saw....and now the best part....all our doors have moulding!!!! Obviously, it's not primed or painted yet...I'm still trying to decide if I'm going to paint it white (to match the doors) or stain it to match the floors. I'm leaning towards staining the moulding we put down for baseboards, but I'm undecided about what to do around the doors...any advice or opinions would be highly appreciated. I also helped with some of the nailing...and in the process learned how to use our new nail gun. Pretty cool...I like power tools. Then, I had my monthly hair appointment...cut and color and cover up my fully gray head...
I've been wearing my hair a bit shorter the last couple of times, and I really like it...there's just something about getting your haircut and styled that makes you feel beautiful and powerful.

So, when I got home, I found another great surprise....Cole had hung our new window screens that came yesterday!!!

You see, since the remodel, our sliding glass doors haven't had anything to cover them up. We had hand me down vertical blinds before, and didn't love them but at the time we put them up, they were our only option. I've been eyeing these sliding screens for a couple of years...and I'm so excited about them! www.gaiam.com, they were on clearance.
The boys were dying for me to take their pic with the new screens.....
And of course....Talia got a little "Dorothy" doll in her happy meal, and she LOVED it. So, Cole had to get her a skull to play with too...and then said (as she's happily playing with the doll and the skull) "That's much better". You know, we have 2 boys...why can't our little girl be girly? Well, she is girly, so maybe he's just trying to widen her horizons. She already likes to play with whatever toys the boys have, so WHY did he have to get out the skull?

Thursday, September 11, 2008

For anyone interested...

This blog, is the blog of a mom with a very small baby in the NICU I work in. I asked her permission to put up a link, because there are many of aspects of my job that are protected by privacy laws, and the things she posts about her baby may give all of you, my friends and family, a better look at the things I deal with on a daily basis that I may not be able to post about. On my list, it will be listed as Baby Jonah.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Back to remodeling...

We're finally back to remodeling mode...at least we have the stuff to get started. I found the moulding I wanted for the around the doors...we went last night to purchase what we needed. It's getting hard, with halloween getting closer, to think that we(meaning Cole) will have time to get all the finish work done. But Cole promises that he will cut all the boards and nail them up...all I have to do is paint them. I enjoy it, so it's no big deal.

I'm still fighting a cold, and I'm cranky, but I did get a small ego boost yesterday...I took in those brown pants I bought to be hemmed by the tailor that I like to go to. Last fall and this past spring she did some alterations for me (Aleena's, in riverdale in the strip mall behind Crown Bedrooms...she does great work for very reasonable prices). She made the comment "this is your size now? it's so small". She remembered that the pants she hemmed last fall for me were 12's, and these were 7/8's...it was just a little ego boost. We all need those.

Nothing else really new is going on, but I am getting my hair done on Friday, and I will get sleep tomorrow, since I have daycare for Talia. Now, if I could just kick this D*%# cold.....

Monday, September 8, 2008

Our Weekend....

1st and foremost...Soccer is back in session. Now normally, I tend to enjoy soccer season despite the time drain it is....I love watching the boys play, and cheering them on. However, this year soccer has had a less than stellar start for us. I only have pics of Alec...both the boys' games were at the same time, and I went to Alec's. So, little rant...Alec's game was scheduled for 12. We got there at 11:45, found his team, and his coach told us that because the field we were supposed to play on was broken---the goal nets couldn't be put up because the bars were broken---we were going to be moved to a different field, and the coordinator was going to come find us and move us. 12 comes, no news. 12:15, still no sign of anyone. Finally, we figure it out ourselves, and start playing at 12:30. By this time, all the kids have lost the "pre game excitement". They weren't really interested in playing anymore. And their coach wasn't really coaching them...they just kind of ran all over the field...or didn't run all over the field. It was way past Talia's naptime, she was grumpy and then eventually crying and screaming....I had to go to work....Everything just seemed very unorganized and scattered, and because I still had to get home and get ready for work, I was frustrated. Cole reports that Kyle's game went much better.

So, I rushed home, ate and got ready for work, and rushed off...to have and AWFUL night at work. I admitted a transport, who was very sick, and despite my best efforts, he got sicker and sicker all night, and by the time I left, we were waiting for the lifeflight team to take him to Primary's....I didn't leave his bedside all night, except for quick potty breaks, to grab a quick snack (since dinner didn't happen) on the run, or to get supplies. By the time anyone had time to say, "here, I'll sit by his bedside so that you can go eat" it was 1 am, and I didn't really want to eat...I just wanted to finish up and go home and crash. Which I finally did.

Of course, my crazy night at work caused a relapse in my cold...Sunday I woke up at 10, still completely wiped out, both physically and emotionally. Plus, I couldn't breath well again. I managed to drag myself to church, and make it through Primary. But we came home early...I don't deal well with Sacrament meeting after I've worked anyway, and with the way I felt yesterday...it just wasn't happening. My in-laws came over, they hadn't been able to make it up to see our new remodeling yet...plus, my FIL brought Fred up for Cole..check out his blog for pics of what I'm talking about.

Alec and Talia had fun playing in the backyard....
Talia discovered dandylions...it was so cute. She started out just plucking the fuzz off, and watching it fly off her hands..then realized she could acutally pick them and look at them. She didn't blow the fuzz yet, though....
Fred. I did keep a few of the multiple pics Cole took of Fred on my camera...but if you want details about the fire, you'll have to check out the above link.

Friday, September 5, 2008

A girl can never have too many Shoes!

Even a 17 month old!!! I want to go on record that I only personally purchased 2 of those pairs of shoes. The other 12 (yes, there are 14 total pairs there) are courtesy of my wonderful friend Michele, who gives me hand me downs from her girls (that reminds me, Michele, I know you read this blog. You really need to get one of your own, so I can keep up with you now that you've abandoned me for your new job :) )...Oh, and one of the pairs of boots were my niece Gracie's, and my SIL was kind enough to hand them down to us. It's especially great, since my daughter LOVES shoes... (I don't know where she got that from, but I didn't take a pic of my shoes for a reason...I'm pretty sure that I have at least as many as she does.)

In case you're all wondering, I am feeling much better, although I still have the cold. We're in the runny, stuffy nose stage, but it's controllable. Yesterday, I got quite a bit done. Well, in between my whiny daughter. She misses the boys. I started cleaning out the fridge, and of course, the minute I had all the food out so that I could scrub the inside (Our brand new pampered chef pitcher had a crack in the bottom, and leaked red kool-aid all over...it seeped in all the cracks under the glass shelves, and in the bottom...it was driving me nuts, but I hadn't had a chance to clean it until yesterday)...anyway, the minute I had all the food out, my sweet baby decided that she wanted to be held. And put back down. And picked back up. And climb back down. And on and on...it took me 3 times as long to do the job as it should have. Oh well....and I also got a year's worth of filing done. (yes, I know I should keep up on it, but I really, really hate to file). It took me 2 hours. But it's done :)!

The best things come in boxes...or play in boxes!

Loving the kitties (or mauling...whatever you prefer!)
Our Cat dog...he licked the remains of the cheese from Talia's snack off her hands, and then climbed onto her tray for any other remnants...

I know there aren't any pics of the boys, but they're gone at school all day. However, they are adjusting well to school. Alec actually ate school lunch every day this week. For those of you who know my middle child, this is a HUGE deal. So far, his homework has been easy for all of us. And Kyle...I'm so excited...he's loving school, doing well (100 percent on his first spelling test!)...but the best part (to me, anyway)...he's reading during his downtime. Without being asked, without timing it as part of his homework...he's reading just for the enjoyment of it. As an avid reader myself, this is soooooooo very exciting to me!!!!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

I hate being sick!!!

So, the usual fall cold has hit our household. It started with Talia...she just had a bit of a runny nose on Sunday. So, monday night, while I was working, I started feeling icky. I went home, slept for 3 hours, got the boys off to school...all the while feeling worse, but not bad enough to call in sick. Then, when Talia and I laid down for our nap, I realized that I was getting really sick, and it was too late to call in sick to work. I couldn't sleep, I was so miserable. Then, my prayers were answered when I was called off, and didn't have to go in. So, I laid around the rest of the day, we ordered pizza for dinner(Cole's not feeling great either), and went to bed early. I had an ok night considering that I had a fever and couldn't breathe really well. Then, of course, I had to get up early this morning...Kyle had to be to school early for choir practice. My fever spiked up to 103, and I was throwing up until I finally got enough meds in me to bring the fever down. And of course, today of all days was a mandatory meeting at work...so, drugged up on Ibuprofen, Dayquil, and Benadryl, I managed to make it through my meeting. And I'm feeling a bit better tonight...and I'm hoping to sleep better too.

Unfortunately, Kyle and Alec are starting with the sniffles too...I hope that they have it like Talia has..just a runny nose. I hope they don't get as sick as I've been....